As a Black Saturday survivor, I have learned that in times of disaster, the strength of our communities and connections is what carries us through. We’ve seen it in action – when fires, floods, and crises hit, it is often the people closest to us who step up. But what if we didn’t wait for disaster to build these connections? What if deep community, rooted in care and mutual support, was how we lived every day?
That is just one of the powerful question at the heart of How We Show Up: Reclaiming Family, Friendship, and Community by Mia Birdsong. This week in DisasterWISE Book Club, we discussed this inspiring call to rethink the ways we connect, support and show up for one another – not just in moments of crisis, but in everyday life. It was a perfect read for the DisasterWISE network, as we work toward strengthen relationships and resilience.
The book club members shared stories and reflections on our own upbringings. As child of the 80’s, I reflected on the connectedness of our suburban neighbourhood. Kids played on the streets and people talked over the fence. We shared the abundance of apricots growing in backyard. Everyone knew who lived where and families going through hard times were bought home-cooked casseroles in corningware.
Something, somewhere shifted. Birdsong explain this as ‘toxic individualism’; “We’ve been sold a lie that independence is the pinnacle of success. But the truth is, we need each other. We always have.”
The Power of Showing Up
Birdsong challenges the idea that individualism is the key to success and instead champions interdependence – the radical act of relying on one another. Through real-life stories and deep reflections, she explores how we can create belonging beyond traditional family structures, nurture friendships that sustain us and build communities where care is a shared responsibility.
For those of us working in disaster resilience, these ideas resonate deeply. We know that when people feel connected – to community, to Country, to a collective purpose – we recover more quickly. Community is the best safety net we have.
Some key learnings for me were;
Community-led resilience: Strength isn’t found in top-down solutions but in relationships, shared resources, and collective action.
Reclaiming mutual aid: Disaster response shouldn’t be charity-based; it should be about mutual care, where everyone has something to offer and receive. There are existing strengths in community that are not recognised in current approaches.
Strengthening social capital – The time to build trust isn’t when a disaster strikes, but in the ‘now’ through everyday acts of kindness and solidarity.
Bringing These Ideas into Action
As a community-led learning network, DisasterWISE centres the wisdom of lived experience. How We Show Up reminds us that resilience isn’t just about preparing for the next crisis – it’s about how we grow and nurture relationships in everyday life.
Maybe start by checking in on a neighbour, sharing a meal, joining (or starting) a local group or network, or simply ‘be present’. When we really show up, we create stronger, connected communities that have the collective power to overcome adversities.
